Do What Makes YOU Happy

What makes you happy? I’m talking genuinely happy. For some it’s friends and family, others enjoy pure solitude. Now let’s think about what can turn our days around without even noticing.

There are two things in my life that change my mood almost instantly. I’m going to give you a hint. It’s actually not my wife and kids, it’s cooking the food I love and music. There is something about the process that is absolutly magical.

It all starts with a thought, tguyhat thought might be “man we need to use up the mushrooms”. From that point I find myself physically and mentally rushing around to see what I can cook that I have never tasted before. In moments like these I find myself putting on music, these tend to be songs that I belt out during the entire process from start to finish.

Growing up my friends and I spent a lot of time at The Stretch cabin. Echo Bay was our playground from sunrise to sunset, often without sleep. I always loved to cook but this is where I found a love for cooking for the people I love.

I was usually the first one up, I would spend 5 minutes clearing the kitchen of miscellaneous beer cans and bottles of Baby Duck. Soon after, you could hear music throughout the cabin, as I was in my happy place. Bodies would start to crawl out of the bedrooms and off the couches to the smell of breakfast. This would go on from the moment we got up till the time we hit the hay. Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner was where I loved to be.

To this day, I love to have my close friends and family over so that I have a reason to create a new experience. Food is a powerful way to express your feelings and emotions. To some, it’s simply a waste of time and only something they must do to live. For others it’s simply life itself. How someone prepares food can tell you a lot about that person.

From Hotdogs to Maple Roasted Red Pepper Gnocchi, I hope that everyone I cook for can feel the love I put forth. Give me a fridge full of food and some Biggie Smalls, and Big Poppa is going to make sure your tummy is fed and your heart is full.

N.R.W

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Proud Daddy

Proud is an understatement, my heart is absolutly filled to the top with all sorts of feels.

If my house is anything like everyother parents then dinner time can be a pain in the ass.

Thing 1 – I don’t want to eat that.

Thing 2 – Throws fork on the ground

Thing 3- Crying

Tonight was going very smooth, then BOOM. That’s right all hell broke loose at the kitchen table. Two of the three kids were crying, there was rice and cutlery everywhere. The girls made dessert before dinner, chocolate mousse and Butterscotch pudding or “Hopscotch pudding” as my oldest calls it. We had a game plan, everyone eat good and then we were able to have two that’s right TWO desserts.

So the melt down is in full swing and then out of nowhere my oldest comes to the rescue. Her baby sister needs to eat 5 small bites of her chicken and then it was dessert heaven, however, she was not and will not calm down. So there she is, my first born baby girl, calming her sister down and doing the oldschool “airplane” move.

She has calmed her down, she gets her to eat all the chicken and absolutely killing the parenting game. My wife has the biggest smile ear to ear and says to her.

Mom- “You are going to be the best mom ever sweetie”

Thing 1 – Smiles and starts to blush “thanks momma”

My heart skipped a beat, my face hurt from smiling and I have never felt so proud in my life. Now for the people who know my daughter, at the age of almost 5, she wants nothing more then to become a mom. My baby girl absolutely melted my heart today. She is such a strong little woman already and she continues to blow me away with her positive winning attitude.

She took control of a situation and absolutely crushed it, at just under 5 years old she carried herself as if she too was a parent. I saw characteristics in her that I don’t see in most adults today.

Needless to say she got her two desserts and then some. It is moments like these that I do not have the words to describe how PROUD I am of my family.

What are some of your PROUD moments? Is there one that just sticks out in your memory or maybe you have a hand full? I want to hear them, comment below or tag someone who has a unique or heartwarming story. I look forward to hearing from you all.

N.R.W

Kindergarten

Orientation day!

Honestly I let my anxiety and hard feelings towards school get in the way a bit today.

My daughter is so excited to start her journey into the world of learning. As a father I’m excited for her. All hard feelings aside, there is a lot to learn in grade school and I’m anxious to watch her learn and grow.

Grade school was a very hard time for me. I went to three school by the time I was 9, which at the time made it very hard to make friends.

“Oh great not another boy!”

This was something I heard, from who ironically later in life became one of my best friends and she actually introduced me to my amazing wife. At the time it hurt but it was something I was used to. I was picked on a lot due to my size so I learned to hide my feelings and bottle everything up.

Always being the outsider I needed a way to “fit in”, so naturally I acted out. In “school” standard I wasn’t very bright, I did poor in class and well homework was not a priority. I hid my report cards and threw away notes from my teachers.

“if you keep this up your going to be no one in life”

“no Nick you need to do it this way, your way is wrong”

I knew from a very young age that school was not a place for me. By grade 12 I worked from 530am to 1030am then I went to school then back to work after class. At the time I had a 3rd period class which I would show up to late due to my work schedual and my teacher constantly harped on me for it. One day I had enough after he called me out in front of everyone.

Teacher -” Nick you come in here late everyday, your dressed in dirty clothes, you seem tired and distracted and your wasting my time”

Teenage Nick ” Oh I’m sorry, iv put in more hours already today then you will put in all week, so dont tell me im wasting your time” (there might have been some foul language in there)

Needless to say I quickly dropped that class and honestly never looked back. Now I’m not here to bash school, I’m not even entirely sure where I was going with that story but oh well.

Honestly I hope my kids grow up having the time of their life in school. I want them to have memories of their favorite teacher and “that one time in grade 4 when we…”. It turns out when you go to 5 different schools you end up with a lot of different friends and even more interesting stories. More then anything i want my children to leave school with amazing memories, and hopefully no debt(that ball is in my court I know).

To my baby girl, your growing up too fast for mom and me but that’s ok. Your going to learn lots both hard lessons and lessons that will come easy. Your going to make friends and lose friends but it’s all part of the process. Just remember to never stop learning, always go after your dreams and never give up on yourself. YOU have the choice to be happy and to enjoy your life. Listen generously, you might learn something from the most unexpected person. One last thing, BE YOURSELF. You are what makes you amazing, if someone doesn’t like it, so what. Your going to do great baby girl, go take what’s yours and never look back because you can’t change what’s already done but you sure as hell can build the road to where you want to go.

N.R.W

Change

Its strange to me that people are so opposed to change. We, as living beings, literally change every second of everyday. From the moment we are conceived, life as we know, evolves. So what is it that people are so afraid of?

Biologically speaking, there is nothing we can do about change, each year we have a birthday and turn yet another year older. Well, that is unless your a women, teachers seem to forget that chapter in biology class that all women when they turn 29 just stop getting older. This is a world wide phenomenon that has scientist’s puzzled.

So, leaving the biological side of change aside, why do people get stuck in their way and avoid altering their day to day lives? Ok, I get it “dont try and fix what’s not broken”. What if I told you that change doesn’t necessarily mean your fixing something, rather you’re fine tuning it.

Let’s look at our life as if it’s a brand new car. You go to the dealership and you pick out that brand new blacked out SUV with the supercharged engine. What happens when you drive it off the lot? It’s not so new anymore is it, It might be to you but try and sell it back to the dealership and your going to get the old model rates. So you decided to keep the SUV, 6 months later your driving past the car lot and what catches your eye? You guessed it the 2019 model just came out. When you see that new model your going to be 1 of three types of people.

  1. The first will pull into the lot find a sales staff and drive the new model home.
  2. The second will drive past at first. A few weeks later after some online research will go in for a test drive and make a calculated decision based on price, value of “new” upgrades and “want vs. need”. Based on that they will either purchase or wait a few years for a future model.
  3. The third honestly didn’t even look towards the car lot and has been driving the same car for some time. No payments are the best payments.

There is no right or wrong way to look at this unless you have no money and are “car broke”. If you’re that person (which I was at a very young age) then your type of change is taking a step back and saving all the spare change you collect.

Just like in the car industry, change is inevitable. It might not always be for the better but I’ll let you in on a little secret…… if you dont like the change that took place, just change it again.

There are 3 things (in my opinion) in my life that dont need to be changed.

  1. My wife and kids (well besides the two youngest they are constantly getting poop and pee on me it seems like)
  2. My mother (she raised me so she must be perfect)
  3. Big Macs, it’s the perfect sandwich and if you disagree well then I must question your life choices.

I believe that in order for us to succeed in life, change is a critical step that we must take. This doesn’t mean you have to clean house every few months and start over. It simply means that life is going to keep moving forward if you like it or not. So, why not make your life the best it can possibly be with some much needed regular maintnace.

N.R.W

My Pride Land

When the hell did I get so God damn soft?

One of my all-time favourite movies growing up was Lion King (hopefully I don’t get in shit for using the title). I and my wife share the love of the movie, it was actually a very vital piece to the puzzle in how I turned into the luckiest man alive. So we sit down for a movie night with the kids and decide to watch this magnificent masterpiece and holy shit did I ever forget about how fucking sad a certain scene is (everyone should know what I’m talking about).

I can’t let my little ones watch this? Wait my parents let me watch this, what the hell were they thinking? Then it hit me like a slap in the face. Unknowingly I have taken in this new age mentality of protecting our children from absolutely everything.

First things first I threw that thought right out the window. Here is the thing, do you guys remember the scene where father and son are up on the……. of course you do. My philosophy on that scene goes like this. Our lives on this planet are how we perceive it, some people take the bad for good and others the good for bad. Everywhere where the light touches are up to ourselves to decide if we turn right or left or choose to look at the glass half full or half empty. Now where the sun does not go is the absolute inevitable, this is where pain and suffering come into play.

We all experience pain and suffering at some point in time. Now the tricky part it teaching our children how to deal with it. There is no right way of doing this but there is a wrong one. Allowing your children to believe it’s all sunshine and rainbows will eventually lead to a breakdown or ultimately, failure.

My Pride Land is a safe space for my family to learn both the good and bad aspects of life. I will protect them with all my power but I will always encourage good and bad mistakes and failure, if we do not learn from our mistakes and learn how to deal with pain or suffering then we can never learn to heal and mend what is “broken”.

Pain is an amazing thing, it allows us to not only feel life at its lowest point but also shows us that all pain is temporary.

N.R.W

PLYR PLYR

So what do you do when you get an email from PLYR Golf ? You go out and buy 8L of milk, that’s what the hell you do.

So 1 year ago, to almost the exact day, I go on a little boys trip to you guessed it. FINAL FOUR BABY! Ok I might be a bit upset about not being able to go this year, but delayed gratification is an amazing thing.

On this trip I got to know this young man who is with our group and we start to talk about life, he asks me pretty much everything about being a young father, and the daily duty that goes along with it. It turns out that this young man sitting next to me is the owner of this company that I have seen everyone around town and on social media supporting. From the little young guns to the 70 year old 100 yards down the pipe beauty. This Company is called PLYR Golf.

I knew right then and there this guy was going to do something special. When I got home I had to message him, I know I don’t mean shit in the big picture but oh well. “Hey man, I just wanted to let you know that you have a good head on your shoulders and I believe in what your doing. Chase that dream and don’t stop till it’s yours.”

This leads us to this email. I have been given an opportunity to support PLYR in a new way, my way, the dad way. I believe in going after opportunities when you believe in them and that some times you need to make those opportunities happen. Thats what PLYR was built on so I’m all in on helping out anyway I can.

http://www.plyrgolf.com

Rodan18 for 10% “dadcount”

Check it out, you won’t be disappointed.

N.R.W

Nap time management.

I know what you are all thinking, how to properly and efficiently organize and plan out your kids napping schedule. I am here to tell you that you are wrong.

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What i actually mean is knowing the signs that your partner is one more juice box away from turning into that hysterical drunk white chick who cant go get corn dogs. Usually when that happens my wife gives me a look and i know right there that i just received a free 20 minutes for me time.

Allowing yourself even 10 minutes a day to let your brain do nothing is something i believe is essential. Your brain needs that 10 minutes to recharge sometimes, let it go off to where ever it wants to go. If that means crash hard for 10 or if it wants to go https://ddwdd.wordpress.com and check out this amazing blog then allow it to do that.

We understand that “alone” time is important, every night my wife goes and has a bath for an hour. I understand that she runs around with the kids all day and by 8 pm she needs it. Some days we don’t really get a minute to talk but that is OK, our brains have to be just as present as we are in order to strive as a family.

I guess i should have called this post “Me time management” but today me and my wife both managed to get in a 10 nap before the circus went to bed so “nap time management” it is.

N.R.W

My Dad’s

Family wedding
I had a conversation today with my dad about a few different things. It started with a question about how he should go about disciplining his grandbabies if and when the situation presented itself. I’m going to be honest it was because my oldest was being a bit of a shit head (definitely comes from my wife not me………….ok that was a lie). We told him that if we are not around he has full authority to discipline as needed, we have been very straight forward with our kids who is in charge when mom and dad are not around.
This leads me to another topic, growing up with two dads. My family was a little bit different from other divorce situations. Mom and Dad promised that they would never fight in front of me and that they would remain civil so it would not cause any mixed emotions towards me. It was really the best thing they could have done. The relationship that they continued to have given our family a different look on things. For instance my brother and sister who are my dads and step moms, call my mom auntie to this day and they are grown up adults.
I honestly don’t remember a whole lot from when i was young so trying to portray my younger years are very difficult. I always listen to people talk about their childhood and go into detail about fucking christmas of 98 or something when they got that new discman, ya sure i had one but you dont need to brag about how you remember getting it. something i do remember is the different styles of parenting i grew up with on both sides but for some reason i could never get away with anything , it was almost as if they were talking to each other? no that couldn’t have been it.
Both my dads brought a different set of rules and regulations to the table. Something that i will always remember my dad telling me is “don’t start something you can’t finish”, in that context it was more so about getting into a scrap. I dont think he realized it at the time but that sentence has been engraved in me with how i look at everything i do in life. There are very few things that i look at and think to myself “i cant do that”, giving birth and flying are two examples. It’s not because i think i can do everything but it’s that fact that i dont want to give up before the fun even starts.
Step dads…. everyone has a different view on step dads. Heres what im going to tell you. If you are someone who is looking to get involved in someones life who has a child make sure you are prepared to be just as involved with that kid as you are with his or her mother. It takes more of a man to be a step dad, I have my 3 beautiful kids and i love them more than anything else, i knew who i was getting involved with and i wanted to start a family. My step dad knew my mom and he took me and her in and gave up a lot so that we would be able to everything that we did. I refused to call him dad, i didn’t listen to him you name it i probably did it.
Everything that i have ever done both my dads have been there to support it or tell me im being a fucking idiot and to smarten up. They might have disagreed on a lot of things that i did growing up and how to discipline me but the one common thing they both agreed on was having my best intrest at heart. It took alot of patience and im sure rum to put up with everything that i did growing up but man am i happy this did.
To my dads I want to say thank you and i love you both, you guys have taught me how to be a man a husband and more importantly a great father.
N.R.W

Emotional Weakness

Emotional Weakness

Emotions are something that i held deep down and strongly believed that they were a sign of weakness. Weakness in my mind was something that was extremely unacceptable and would be the reason i would not be able to succeed in life not just financially but more importantly as a father and husband.

There was a moment in my life that changed my world upside down and i had this new view on how i perceived my emotional side. It took me all of 6 hours for me to know that i wanted to spend as much time as i possibly could with this women who fell into my life when i I needed her the most. I found myself speechless and with elephants running around my chest. The first time in my life i was nervous to kiss this Angel because i was so afraid that she would reject me and i would loose this opportunity (this was all in the first 6 hours). We spend every waking moment together from then on, we didnt watch movies or hang out with people, for the first few weeks we would talk non stop every moment of everyday.

You could argue that our first official “date” could go down in history as the worst date ever. Leading up to the dinner was fine everything was amazing then we get into the truck.

Then GF: I should let you know every date that iv been on has gone horribly wrong and we never speak again after.

Me: oh ok…… that’s reassuring.

We pull up to the restaurant and i receive a phone call. My grandmother was ill and it was my mom calling to let me know that she had passed away. I had just lost one of the few people in my life that truly meant something to me but i knew i needed to finish this date. I didn’t know it at the time but that date is a perfect depiction of how i need my wife in my life.

As one protector left this life another one was able to step right into mine and save me from absolute self destruction. I tell people all the time that “My wife saved my life” she taught me to not be afraid of love and how to allow my emotions to show and not hide behind a fake smile layered with drugs and alcohol.

July 17 2013 A.L.W was born and the moment i heard her little scream i turned into an emotional flood gate. If that was weakness then i want to be the weakest dad in town the love that filled my body was the drug i had been looking for all these years. From that moment on the only thing i need or truly care about is my family, it has grown with the addition of E.S.W and P.J.W, each with their own distinct characteristics and each filling up a different part of my heart.

Your parents always told you that “you will understand when you have kids of your own” but i didn’t realize how many aspect of fatherhood that statement really applied to. From the late nights because the baby wont sleep to the 4 am wake up call because ” i want to watch my movie”. Being a dad is truly the the most rewarding journey i have ever been on. I tell all my soon to be dad friends “welcome to the most amazing part of life”.

There is a time and a place to show no weakness and be strong for your children and wife but they also need to see a side of dad that needs to be comforted and lifted. Children are an amazing gift and no part of their lives should be wasted or neglected. The love and strength my wife and children have given me i will never be able to repay them but i know that with the right guidance and positive reassurance they will continue to spread that love to their own families and more.

N.R.W

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